You know how I know hockey is almost here?
I know because the Sabres sent this email to me today:
No wait. That’s how I know THE WIGGLES are almost here.
(Seriously, the Sabres sent me an email advertising the Wiggles concert. Which part of “Sabres Fan” indicates I’m also a fan of grown men singing songs for toddlers? Surely I’m not the only one who can see the stark differences between these two fanbases. I seem to have recieved the email as part of my highly exclusive status as a “Sabres Insider”. I love the prestige and influence of my Sabres Insider status- I wouldn’t give it up for the world- but frankly, I have no interest in being a Wiggles Insider. Also, shouldn’t the password for The Wiggles Special Pre-Sale Offer be “WIGS”? They’re not called the “Waggles” you stupidheads.)
No, the real reason I know that hockey is almost here is that IT REALLY IS ALMOST HERE. Training camp starts on FRIDAY! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!