Sweet mother of mercy, you’re a slow poke. Do you really need so many pitching changes? I will always love you, but DANG you’re a slow moving mofo. (But thanks for creating a situation where we got to see five men in the infield last night. That was a hoot. I’m rooting for Philly, but I wish that sassy scheme had worked, just for the wacky factor.)
I like you when the Bills win, but when they lose I feel resentful about the time I lost watching you. I think I’d often prefer to be doing other things. Sorry.
Um, I know almost nothing about you. Carry on.
I love you so. I love how you are fast, and beautiful, and dangerous. I love how there is very little downtime during a hockey game. I think you are so much better than the others.