Own the Podium

While I was drinking my coffee and puttering around online this morning, I stumbled upon this article about the Canadian “Own the Podium” program.

Now look, I’m all for our Canadian friends picking up their fair share of medals, and I also applaud the idea that finishing 4th isn’t good enough, but good grief.  This program just seems so…un-Canadian.

Look what you did, Canada!  Now all your athletes are underachieving and freaking out under the pressure.  They’re crying when they lose because they feel like they’ve let the country down.  That’s not cool, Canada.  Canadians don’t need to dominate- you guys are supposed to be nice and chillaxed.  That’s your thing.  You don’t want to be like the USA and China and Russia.  Sure we win lots of medals, but we’re also kind of a-holes.  You guys are supposed to nicer than us.  Come on.

Anyway, the whole thing reminds me of the episode of Arrested Development when George Michael, encouraged by his well meaning but delusional father, decides to run for student body president.  I’ve had little clips of that episode running through my head all day, specifically the line, “Everybody loves you!  You’re George Michael CANADA! Who’s cooler than you?”

The thing is, everyone DOES love George Michael.
…(but we’re still voting for STEVE HOLT).

U-S-A!  U-S-A!  U-S-A!

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4 Responses to “Own the Podium”


  1. 1 Shauna February 24, 2010 at 5:40 pm

    It is un-Canadian and now we have to eat crow. We hate crow, which is why we usually go into the Olympics with low expectations – not cool either. But I must say, haven’t you ever met a Canadian hockey fan? We are the biggest A-holes around!

  2. 2 Katebits February 24, 2010 at 6:07 pm

    Well, you’re DEFINITELY a-holes about hockey. I’ll give you that, Shauna. :D

    If you aspire to be REAL a-holes though, what you should do is reFUSE to eat crow, and instead claim you don’t care about stupid medals anyway. That’s what we’d do. Didn’t medal in bobsledding? Who cares! What a STUPID sport that is! Didn’t medal in curling? PUH-LEAZE. Have you SEEN curlers?! They’re all doughy. That is NOT a sport.

    See? It’s easy. :P

  3. 3 Kathleen February 24, 2010 at 8:21 pm

    Genius. USA is SO Steve Holt to Canada’s George Michael.

    Oh, I love Jason Bateman.

  4. 4 ToonTom February 25, 2010 at 10:20 am

    As a Canadian, I don’t have a problem with the Own The Podium program for what it is – properly funding athletes to excel on the world stage. I think better wording like Go For The Gold, Reach New Heights or the scouter Do Your Best would have been more Canadian.

    BTW, my daughter pointed out we really do own the podium. It was paid for with Canadian dollars and is on Canadian soil.

    BTW #2 – our local paper just ran a news story about how Ryan Miller’s grandfather was born in Zehner, Saskatchewan – not far from where I live in Saskatoon. That’s why he’s so good. It’s in his genetic make-up.


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