Last night Heather and I took in a game from the 6th row, sitting directly to the left of the tunnel to the visitors dressing room. This was quite a different perspective for me, because I usually sit up in the balcony with the riff-raff.
Things you notice when sitting in the 6th row that you don’t notice in the balcony
- The rink looks TINY and the players look MASSIVELY LARGE.
- Right above the tunnels to the dressing room behind the benches, there is a pane missing from the glass. I’ve never noticed that before on television, but let me tell you, when you are sitting directly behind the missing pane of glass you’re suddenly hyper aware of the fact that it’s not there. Heather and I totally could have died at that game. We’re lucky to be alive, frankly.
- The hockey players are really, really, really good at ice skating. I found myself hugely distracted by their fancy footwork. When you’re sitting that close the speed seems incredible. The fact that they are leaping around doing goofy little pirouettes while pushing a little black disc around with a stick just seems insane.
- We got a lot of time to check out the Ducks while they were standing around near their bench, so, here is my highly professional report on them: I don’t care how much you scoff at his 70’s porn star mustache, George Parros is hot. I’m worried that maybe I think he’s hot because of the mustache rather than in spite of it. Which, when you think about it, brings up a whole cornucopia of other disturbing issues, not the least of which is that I caught myself wondering if Netflix carries any 70’s porn in its inventory. I dunno. The Parros thing was kind of confusing. Ryan Getzlaf is reeeeally ugly (even before Goose demolished his face). Rob is better looking than Scott. Chris Pronger reminds me of blond guy who played the villain in all the 80’s high school dramas- the guy who got knocked out by the Karate Kid. That guy. (I’m actually not sure if this idea was planted in me by another hockey blogger, or if I came up with that likeness myself. Either way, it’s totally true.)
- Derek Roy really is just a wee little fella.
- I was paying close attention to Goose’s faceoffs. I’ve noticed him doing it on television, but sitting so close it’s very noticable how he’s constantly pointing at his teammates and telling them where to stand. The rest of the Sabres just dutifully shuffled around until they were arranged to his liking. At one point he was rearranging them over and over. He’d be like, “Pommerdoodle, you stand there. No wait. Timmy you stand there. Okay, now Jaro and Pommerdoodle switch places. No, no, go back. No. Not like that. Staffy! Why are you way over there? Come closer. NO! TOO CLOSE! Yeah. There. You stay there, Timmy. Good.” It was totally odd, but really fun to watch. It’s possible he was just switching them around as the Ducks scooted around, but I couldn’t figure out the pattern at all. To my untrained eye it just looked like Goose was having an OCD moment, and I half expected one of the other Sabres to suddenly be all, “GOOSE! Snap out of it! We’re FINE where we are!” but they never did. They just went where he told them to go without any lip.
- When you’re sitting super close, you occasionally feel like you are looking at animals in a zoo, until all of a sudden one of those animals makes direct eye contact and you get all weirded out.
Things you DON’T notice in the sixth row:
- For the most part, I had no idea what the hell was going on with the game. I could see most of the surface of the rink, but the net on the far side of the ice was at an incredibly odd angle. I tried to look at the jumbotron when the play was down there, but the camera was on the other side, so the action on the screen was opposite from what I was looking at. The end result was that I had a surprisingly difficult time keeping track of the game. I’m not sure how many games I would have to see from that vantage point before I got used to it, but I suspect it would be a lot.
- I cannot accurately judge how well the Sabres played. The energy just DRAINED out of the arena once the Ducks scored their shortie, but overall the Sabres didn’t look that bad to me. They certainly didn’t look great, Lalime obviously could have been better, but other than that….I don’t know. *shrug* I was too busy looking at the clear tape they use to keep their socks up to also keep track of their playing. The Sabres need Miller and Vanek back, ASAP if they want to make the playoffs. Duh.
- I have no idea what happened with Goose and Getzlaf at the end there. It happened on the far side of the rink, and I never saw the replay because I was too busy staring in horror at Goose laying facedown and motionless on the ice. Then, Getzlaf walked right by us with blood and guts everywhere. It was gee-ross. I’ve heard some squawking that Goose’s hit was dirty, and if that’s true I will be so sad, and I will always blame Jerry Sullivan for ruining everything.