Archive for the 'Ilya Kovalchuk' Category

7 Things: Special HAHAHAHAHA Kovalchuk Edition

1. That game was awesome. It was sloppy and fun and both teams looked like they were really trying even though both teams looked liked they’re not that good at hockey. Great fun. I know it’s easy to say after a win, but I SWEAR (on the head of Lindy Ruff) that I would’ve been raving about that game even if the Sabres had lost.

2. But they DIDN’T lose! They won! Which means the Sabres are now streaking and that they will never lose again (as long as they always play the Devils and that Kovalchuk is always inexplicably mesmerized by Enroth’s steely gaze and he always totally whiffs on the puck in the shootout). Somewhere, Darcy Regier just smiled wryly and mumbled, “I love it when a super-mega-patient plan comes together.”

3. Can we PLEASE stop talking about how great Lindy is now? Congratulations on 1,000 games, Lindy Ruff!

Okay, okay. 1,000 games with one team is a major accomplishment, and seriously, congrats Lindy. For all the smack I’ve talked about him on this blog, you have to be deaf, blind, AND mean-spirited not to see that Lindy is a pretty cool dude.

However, I’m sure I’m not the only Sabres fan who has found this day a little *sing-song voice* awwwkwaaaard. For the first time in his tenure, Lindy’s effectiveness is being called into question, and then today we all had to stop the, “WHY have the Sabres had the same coach for 13 years?!” conversation and celebrate Lindy’s (very real) achievement. It was just kind of bad timing. I made a joke on Twitter today that if Lindy was really such a great coach he would have found a way to coach his 1,000th game LAST season, when the team spent the whole year at the top of the standings, instead of this season, when Sabres fans are so desperate for wins we’re jumping for joy just because Kovalchuk can’t keep his eye on the puck in the shootout. Instead, we spent the whole day hearing and reading “1000 games” and thinking, “Yeeeeeah, I’m not so sure those 1,000 games were the most healthy thing for the organization, but…okay….Yay Lindy!”

I’m not saying that Lindy doesn’t deserve to be honored, and I’m not saying he’s not the Truest True Sabre that ever was, I’m just saying this would have been a LOT more fun if the Sabres weren’t so stinky.

4. But the Sabres aren’t stinky anymore. Now they rock! WOOOOOO! TWO WINS IN A ROW!!!!

5. The following people seem like nice guys, but I’m not sure they should ever get to play hockey as Sabres again: Patrick Lalime and Craig Rivet

6. I’m not sure if it’s the Sabres fault, or MSG’s fault, but it is absolutely atrocious that we have to watch the Devils feed during intermissions. WHAT ARE WE, ANIMALS?

7. This has nothing to do with that game, but I’ve been on a weeks-long hunt for the perfect apple, and I believe I’ve found it. The perfect apple is……an EMPIRE APPLE! Empire apples have all of the qualities of a good apple. Not too huge, nice and sweet, and most importantly, very crunchy. (By “crunchy” I mean texturally crunchy, not reminiscent of Ryan Miller.)

I’ve had this problem for years where I can’t ever remember which apples I like, and so this year I very methodically purchased lots of different apples and then kept NOTES (like an apple-nerd) on which ones I liked. So, I feel confident that Empire apples actually ARE the best apples in the world. 1st Runner up: Fujis. I also loved the texture and crunch of the Honey Crisp, but sadly, it didn’t have enough flavor. (So close, Honey Crisp. Keep trying! Maybe next year.)

I’m pretty sure there are a bunch of hideously gross red apples that I didn’t even bother trying because when I poked them with my thumb at Wegmans they were obviously too soft, but the worst apple I tried was a Granny Smith. Those green grannies are waaaay too sour. I’m not really into “sour” as a flavor, but maybe that’s just me.

Congratulations, Empire. You win.


…A Blog About the Buffalo Sabres

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In accordance with the Fair Use Copyright Law, The Willful Caboose uses logos and registered trademarks of the National Hockey League to convey my criticism and inform the public of the Sabres' suckitude/badassitude (whatever the case may be). Photos on The Willful Caboose are used without permission, but do not interfere with said owner's profit. If you own a specific image on this site and want it removed, please e-mail me (willfulcaboose [at] gmail [dot] com) and I will be more than happy willing to oblige. (Special thanks to The Pensblog for their help with this disclaimer.)

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