Sabres vs. Rangers 3/10/08

Tonight I’m going to do something I vowed I would never do again: I’m going to watch the Sabres game on a DVR delay. I have viola related activities scheduled for 3 out of the next 4 game nights. It’s hard to write about games that I don’t watch, so, for the good of the blog (and for the bad of my mental health), I’m going to absorb the carnage “live”. Then I’ll share my slowly unfolding horror with you, starting at about 9:oopm. Doesn’t that sound like fun for everybody?

Feel free to leave spoilers/rants/raves in the comments. I’ll be in a media blackout until I’m all caught up.


Mood: Good! I’ve been rehearsing beautiful music with good friends. Life is good.
Favorite Sabre: Aww, who’s a cuter captain than Pommerdoodle? No one. That’s who.
Least Favorite Sabre: Thomas Vanek. Thomas, you made me a promise, and my faith in your ability to deliver is starting to wear thin. It’s time for a little less “slag-faced whore” and a lot more “future of the Sabres”.
Animal representing my hopes for this game: Hm. This is a tough one. Thanks to Eliot Spitzer, I’ve got high-priced escorts on the brain, so I’m going to go with that. I’m going to be really generous and say that my hope is represented by Julia Roberts in “Pretty Woman”.

She’s cute, but she’s probably got cooties.

After the 1st (1-1)

Mood: Unimpressed.
Favorite Sabre: Pommerdoodle is the only Sabre I trust these days. The dude is such a steady little puppy.
Least Favorite Sabre: Staffy and Millsie, I love you both, but seriously, you suck.
Animal representing my hope for this game: Sigh. Deuce Bigalow, Male Gigolo

Deuce Bigalow
This game is not even remotely funny, you guys.

After the 2nd (2-2)

Favorite Sabre: I’m sticking with the Doodle.
Least Favorite Sabre: I’m still kind of pissed at Staffy. I think Lindy might be too. Has Staffy been benched, or is he just being invisible?
Whore representing my hope for this game: Thomas Vanek, I so want to love you!


Oh sure, he’s a whore. But he’s OUR whore.

At the End (3-2 SO, Rangers)

Mood: So, so sad.
Favorite Sabre: Pommers, you are so easy to root for.
Least Favorite Sabre: Staffy, have you been eating enough brains?
Summary of thoughts: *sniff*
Whore representing my hopes for the playoffs: I really don’t want to do this, but I’m sorry, the Sabres have left me no choice….

It’s not pretty, folks.

UPDATE: Okay, I’m going to depart from the format because I’m don’t feel ready to quit bitching about this game. All of our defensemen are broken, which might not matter because we are running out of time anyway, but still. Poor Pratt and Toni Tone Tony had to play, like, 735 minutes tonight. I feel like this game was the sum of all fears. The Sabres are broken, and down and out. Bucky Gleason gets to gloat. Chris Drury is smug. The crazies get to rant on WGR. Crunchy seems worn out and worn down. Getting to the playoffs will require a near miracle.

BUT, Goose did look very cute in his rally helmet. It’s not nothing, I suppose. Plaintive HONK! (I’m not sure how straight men and lesbians can tolerate sports on nights like tonight.)


15 Responses to “Sabres vs. Rangers 3/10/08”

  1. 1 mcguffers March 10, 2008 at 7:59 pm

    I was quite disturbed when Gaustad got the penalty in the Hurricanes game for goaltender interference when he was clearly checked into the goalie by another player. But tonight, Goose has done basically the same thing to the Rangers, drawing two penalties. So now, all I can picture (thanks to this blog) is Crunchy in his shower cap and goggles and Goose with his tin can discussing their strategy in the locker room before the game. Something like:

    PG: Hey Millsy
    RM: Yeah Goose.
    PG: How would you feel about me throwing various Rangers on top of you throughout the game so they get interference penalties?
    RM: It could work. But no big guys. And no Sean Avery. I’ve heard he bites.
    (After second period)

    RM: Not cool Goose, not cool. Sjostrom’s a tank and he tried to slice my head of with his stick!
    PG: Yeah, but we scored! And I did better with Dawes. He’s a little guy.
    RM: (sulking) Fine. But remember what I said about Avery.

  2. 2 Glenn March 10, 2008 at 8:32 pm

    2 to 2 with a minute to go in the 3rd period…..I guess it’s gonna be one of THOSE games….

  3. 3 danielleia March 10, 2008 at 9:11 pm

    Why Goose, you look wonderful with your backwards rally helmet!

  4. 4 Amy March 10, 2008 at 9:20 pm

    RM: Not cool Goose, not cool. Sjostrom’s a tank and he tried to slice my head of with his stick!

    RM, you might not want to listen to the Versus broadcast, where they claim that your near decapitation was not worthy of a penalty.

  5. 5 Anne March 10, 2008 at 10:00 pm

    I already loved Paul Gaustad but after Pommer’s goal when I saw him clapping like a loon with his backwards helmet I fell into full swoon. I love Staffy but Pommerdoodle and Goose are putting his status as favorite Sabre in serious jeopardy.

  6. 6 Katebits March 10, 2008 at 10:08 pm

    HAHAHAHAHAHAH!! mcguffers, you are beating me at my own game! Thank you so much. I really needed that laugh!

    Goose with his rally helmet really WAS the highlight of the evening.

  7. 7 Meg March 10, 2008 at 10:09 pm

    We have no defensemen. This sucks! Guys better be healthy by Wed.

  8. 8 Glenn March 10, 2008 at 10:33 pm


  9. 9 Dan March 10, 2008 at 11:56 pm

    How much longer can we expect Miller to prop this team up??? At some point the defense is going to have to show up. At this point, the season is done in 12 games. I don’t buy it that the loss of Drury and Briere are the whole problem. The team has no heart or no drive. Look at those penaly shots tonight. Could Stafford be any slower??? Come on!!!!! I’m 38, out of shape, and I could probably skate as well!!!!

  10. 10 Meg March 11, 2008 at 1:39 am

    At some point the defense is going to have to show up.

    At this point there is no defense to show up. The defense actually played quite well tonight, I thought, given that they were down to 4 defensemen, one of whom is banged up.

  11. 11 Jaime March 11, 2008 at 8:13 am

    I was at the game last night and had so many little ups and downs. Pmmers was a little steam engine out there but Miller, not so good with a suspect goal. I have resigned myself to the fact that we won’t make the playoffs but maybe then I can get a mini pack for next season.

    But, on another note, my crush on Goose had been waning lately but this game has secured him back in my heart. He was so cute after the goal and then at the end of the third after the fight. He lost a contact and kept pointing to his eye. Someone finally must have reallized what he was honking about and got him a new one at which point he just stuck it in his eye right there on the bench.

  12. 12 eSpencer March 11, 2008 at 11:30 am

    Lovely Lindy needs to take this team on his shoulders and motivate like only a buffalo down and out coach can. Crunchy should be benched for two games. His goaltending has been sub b’flo par for two weeks at least. Send Thomas Vanek to Rochester for three games, get a defensemen and feed the puck to anyone within a 10 foot arc around the goal. Seriously could the sabres practive one on one time with crunchy until they score 3 goals a piece to maybe get some SO skills… disgusted from 150 miles away!

  13. 13 tsoemvs March 11, 2008 at 11:40 am

    Lovely Lindy needs to take this team by the short ones and pull them from the depths of sadness into a the glorious bflo ranks of elite playoff teams! Its in there somewhere! Crunchy needs two games off. He is soft… at least the Defence will step up to protect if he wasn’t there providing a paper bag infront of the goal. Can Lindy also please send Vanek to Roch for some learning and get a Defensemen to give Toni Tone tony a break for a period or 3.
    Maybe while crunchy is out he could be training the sabres on how to score one on one with the goalie… we have had a consistent problem in SO time…. maybe we should pressure the league into playing 4 on 4 instead of a shootout…. defense is not an option.

    sad from 150 miles east of BLFO

  14. 15 Katebits March 16, 2008 at 7:23 pm

    Sorry you got trapped in the spam folder, tsoemvs! I just caught it! Thanks for your comment!

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