Game 6 Live Blog

I’ve decided what I want to happen. I want the exact opposite of the game on Monday to happen tonight. I want the Red Wings to score two goals in the first, and for the Penguins to calmly come back in the second and third, only to have the Wings tie it up with 35 seconds remaining in the game. Then, I want three OT periods culminating in a PP goal to win the Stanley Cup for the Red Wings. I realize, this is a dicey plan from a rooting standpoint. It’s a long shot, certainly, but I’m up to the task.

Here’s the script:

Go Red Wings (for one period)!

Go Penguins (for two periods)!

Go Red Wings (for the last minute of the game)!

Go goalies (for two OTs)!

GO RED WINGS FOR THE STANLEY CUP!

Let’s see if the teams can deliver…

Pregame

I have dinner on the stove, and laundry in the washing machine. This is the perfect storm of not-being-focused-enough-to-do-a-live-blog. But I am getting excited. WOOOOOOO!!

Lidstrom has the weirdest accent. Swedish, midwest….Southern?

I’m totally confused about this Hulk movie. Wasn’t there a Hulk movie, like last summer? With Jennifer Connolly and some other dude painted green? Is this a sequel, or are we just pretending that other Hulk movie never happened?

1st Period

18:08: I hate the Mellon arena white out. I also think Ryan Malone is a tool.

17:45 Hm. The Red Wings defense looks lame tonight. Come on boys, you need to score two goals in the first. Just stick to the script. It’ll all work out fine.

15:30: Detroit is on the PP, and I’m such a focused fan that I am wildly flipping between NBC and CBC. The CBC picture might be too dark to bear.

WOOOOOOOOOOO!! Red Wings score! It’s all going according to plan! 1-0, Detroit!

14:01: Huh. Malkin didn’t look like puke for a second. He didn’t score, but he didn’t puke on himself, which is a marked improvement. Good work, my little Russian speaking buddy!

12:24: I am now eating the spiciest black beans ever made. Are you telling me it’s wrong to add red pepper all willy-nilly during the cooking process? Holy Toledo….these are confusing times in my mouth.

11:00 Kris Draper is fired for being a goon and an ass and for giving Pittsburgh a 5-on-3.

9:53 Dude, I LOVE watching Penguins 5-on-3s! It reminds me of the Sabres, only without the searing frustration!

6:38 NBC is in love with the Pens.

4:33 The Pens don’t have a lot of zip tonight. I’m thinking, too much pizza.

1:17 I think I fully support the Sabreization of Free Candy, Brooks Orpik. Get to work, Darcy.

:41 I’m getting scared that the Wings are not going to score again and we will be derailed from our super thrilling script already.

1st Intermission

I hate Don Cherry with the burning passion of a million red hot suns. I have to go deal with my laundry. I’ll be right back.

2nd Period

19:45 Okay, perhaps this game won’t follow my perfect script. I guess I’d be fine with the Red Wings just winning in a normal, orderly fashion.

17:54 Okay, here’s a Pens power play. Let’s see what they’ve got.

15:54 They’ve got nothing, that’s what they’ve got.

13:45 I’m now eating a weird flavor of Perry’s ice cream. It’s cake flavored, with swirls of blue frosting, and multi-colored “confetti”. I can’t really explain the urge to buy it in the first place. Normally the food coloring alone would keep me away from this stuff…..but it’s kind of good.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Fillfilplaillgfilppla scores! 2-0, Detroit! The script is back on track!

10:47 Hm. Theoretically I should be cheering for the Pens now if I want the thrilling reverse conclusion from game 5, but I don’t know if I can switch gears like that.

9:33 There is NO sign of life from the Pens. I think what we can safely deduce here is that while the Pens were eating pizza, the Red Wings were eating sensible and nourishing, scientifically-calculated, high-protein goo. As a result, the Red Wings are not feeling sleepy and bloated.

7:45 Okay, that was a little bit of feist from Sid. He must of had some high-protein goo.

5:04 I lost interest in the game for a second. The Pens seem to be on the power play.

Hm. Malkin scores. Well, I’m glad it was Malkin, and this is right on script. The script suddenly concerns me. (2-1. Detroit)

3:58 Okay, as a person rooting for the Wings, I am ready for this period to end.

3:48 Oh wait! Gary Roberts take a penalty killing all momentum for his team! WOOOO!

1:51 Rats. Much to the delight of the NBC crew, the Pens kill the penalty.

:45 Dude, why aren’t the Pens letting the Wings score?

2nd intermission

Ooooh. The Stanley Cup Ad is so amazing in non-tiny non-YouTube format. That ad still gives me chills. I think I love the music the most. When we first saw it, Pookie said “There are so many Devils in it!” Perhaps because there are no Sabres in it, all I can see is the bright, beautiful Cup. I watched that ad about thirty times before I even noticed the specific guys and uniforms. I reeeeeally hope we see the Cup tonight! EEEEEEEEE!!!!

Okay, now I’m a little nervous. It was that damn Cup ad! It got me all riled up!

3rd Period

17:47 The Pens still aren’t sucking quite enough for my tastes.

13:39 This game is pretty stressful now. The Pens are not laying down to die like I wish they would.

Wait! What?! A goal?! Aw, Fleury punches it in with his ass. Heh. WOOOOOOOOOOO!!! It’s an own-ass-goal! 3-1, Detroit!

9:17 What going on? With an insurance goal I’m losing a little bit of my focus. The Pens can’t possible come back after an own-ass-goal, can they?

7:53 M’kay. The ice is tilted in the Red Wings favor again.

5:11 The Red Wings are quite good at hockey. They could very well be the best team in hockey. I wonder if there is some kind of prize or trophy that we could give them to award them for being so very good at hockey. Hmmm? Any ideas? Anyone?

1:47 Osgood just made perhaps his only save tonight. Seriously. Have the Pens had a shot on goal in the last twenty minutes? But a penalty on the way to Detroit.

NOOOOOOOOOO!!! For FUCKS SAKE! I just want to see the Cup! 3-2, Detroit!

:45 Okay, I am SWEATING bullets now!

33: I was hoping for a good game, but NOT THIS GOOD!

Go, clock, go!

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! The Red Wings Win! The Red Wings win! What a finish! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Wow. That final Hossa shot is going to haunt the Pens and their fans all summer. That was a VERY amazing finish, and the Pens should be proud of putting up such a impressive fight.

Um, fuck you NBC! This isn’t a freaking funeral! The Wings just won the Cup! WOOOOOOOOO!

Marjory the Trash Heap wins the Conn Smyth! I love that guy!

Gaaaaaaaaaasp!! There it is! There it is! Oh. My. God. It’s so beautiful.

Oh, I love this so much!

It’s really too bad this didn’t happen in Detroit though. Igloo=stunned. This is more fun with a screaming arena.

I can’t even imagine what this would be like if………..maybe someday.

Ah, hockey.

*warm fuzzies*

THE END :D

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20 Responses to “Game 6 Live Blog”


  1. 1 Heather B. June 4, 2008 at 8:21 pm

    They’re mostly pretending the last Hulk movie didn’t happen.

    I love Nicky’s Swedish Midwestern accent. It’s kind of like Brodeur’s French-Canadian Jersey accent.

  2. 2 Katebits June 4, 2008 at 8:38 pm

    I’m all for forgetting about pretending that other Hulk movie never happened, but I think they should have let a little time pass out of respect. Let’s allow the stink to clear the room before dropping another box office bomb.

  3. 3 karen June 4, 2008 at 8:38 pm

    Somewhere in the middle of the Game 5 third period, I became desperate for Pittsburgh to win. I have no idea why. Because I don’t want hockey season to end? A liking for Sidney Crosby that I’ve hidden from the world, including myself? I remained on edge until they pulled it off, was then ecstatic, and promptly fell asleep. I’ve been troubled by this desire for the Pens to win ever since. Why?? WHY?? I still don’t know why, but I still do want them to win.

  4. 4 Heather B. June 4, 2008 at 8:41 pm

    Dude, I LOVE watching Penguins 5-on-3s! It reminds me of the Sabres, only without the searing frustration!

    It’s definitely much funnier when it’s not the Sabres. Again, how can a team with so much offensive talent be WORSE when they have more people on the ice? It’s a mystery.

  5. 5 Katebits June 4, 2008 at 8:49 pm

    Karen, the Pens got to me a little too, last game, but I think I’ve righted the ship. But the Pens are spunky and fun, I think they are a perfectly fine rooting interest. Max Talbot alone is pretty powerful. I’m mostly just cheering for the Wings tonight because I have to miss G7.

    Heather, a feeble 5 on 3 is a surprisingly common mystery.

  6. 6 JBo June 4, 2008 at 8:49 pm

    NBC loves the Pens.

    Yeah, I could’ve told you that around the first of the year.

  7. 8 karen June 4, 2008 at 9:13 pm

    I think a feeble 5-on-3 is human nature. There are so many of us! Why work hard? Since I still have this weird attachment to the Pens, it made me a little queasy to watch, though…it was that weak. Maybe another of those and I’ll be back to my old self, watching hockey for hockey and not really rooting for either of these teams.

  8. 9 Shari June 4, 2008 at 9:23 pm

    Helm just went off the ice. Hmmm…Didn’t look like that hard of a hit. Maybe he ate to much fruit.

  9. 10 Shari June 4, 2008 at 9:28 pm

    Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeessssssssssss!! There Kate, got your second goal! A little off script but Yaaaaaaaaay!

  10. 11 karen June 4, 2008 at 10:20 pm

    Ouch. Poor Fleury!

  11. 12 Katebits June 4, 2008 at 10:24 pm

    Yeah, that goal was bruuuutal. (But hilarious)

  12. 13 karen June 4, 2008 at 10:31 pm

    You’re dead on about the funny! Once I got over wincing, I swallowed a hearty round of giggles.

  13. 14 karen June 4, 2008 at 10:38 pm

    Hope! A flash of hope!

  14. 15 Katebits June 4, 2008 at 10:49 pm

    Well, I’m sorry they lost for you Karen, but what a finish!

  15. 16 karen June 4, 2008 at 10:59 pm

    They tried right to the end…and now I’m feeling sorry for Detroit. What a buzzkill to win the Stanley Cup at an away game!

  16. 17 Shari June 4, 2008 at 11:00 pm

    I’m happy but I feel so bad for that goalie. Man, that was sooo close at the end there! Ok, on to warm weather and weekend campfires!
    Hopefully, we’ll have a better year this time around.

  17. 18 Pookie June 4, 2008 at 11:43 pm

    Great diary, Kate! I’m sorry I didn’t come over here earlier!

    What’s so weird about the Devils in that awesome Cup commercial is that they aren’t the biggies. It’s like, “Scott Stevens? No? OK, Turner Stevenson works. I guess.” It would be like when the Sabres do win it, putting Kotalik on instead of Crunchy.

  18. 19 Schnookie June 4, 2008 at 11:44 pm

    What a great live blog, Katebits! And WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! I think the Pens need a bit of that cake-flavored ice cream now to help cheer them up. While the Wings eat a few Cupfuls of protein goo before Babcock gets them back to work tomorrow morning to start their defense of the Cup.

  19. 20 Katebits June 5, 2008 at 12:56 am

    Why thank you, IPB! This diary is but a mere shadow of your msaterworks, but it was my first try at a real, full length recap.


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