Just Trying to Help

Dear Lindy Ruff,

I’ve been getting frustrated lately listening to the players going on and on about how they “need to stick to the system.”  I’m beginning to suspect that they are just parroting things that they’ve heard in practice.  I’m not at all convinced they even know what “the system” is.  I hate to say it, but I don’t think the Sabres are very smart.  Maybe “the system” is too hard for them.  I got you a book that I think might help.

hockey-for-dummies

If I thought Roy-Z could read I’d give the book directly to him.

If they STILL can’t execute the system after reading this book (or having it read to them, if they can’t read), I think you seriously have to consider shock collars.  Also, I’ve found that “The Dog Whisperer” is a really good resource for tips on how to keep your NHLer happy and under control.  Just like dogs, hockey players want to be good, but they need consistent discipline. An unruly dog hockey player, is an unhappy dog hockey player.

Sincerely,

Katebits

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10 Responses to “Just Trying to Help”


  1. 1 Kim November 15, 2008 at 7:57 pm

    If only that book existed, we might actually have a chance at winning…

  2. 2 Ryan November 15, 2008 at 8:52 pm

    This is awesome. If only the book was a bit more simplified and got more pucks deep.

  3. 3 Pete November 15, 2008 at 10:18 pm

    Inside is one page. It reads “Follow the system. Don’t forget to follow the system. If you do forget to follow the system, remember to blame not following the system. System. System. System.”

  4. 4 Chaz November 15, 2008 at 10:43 pm

    Does it come with drawings and REALLY big letters? My 5 yr old nephew is good at reading those kinds of books, I’m sure the Sabres could do it too!

  5. 5 Shari November 16, 2008 at 12:10 am

    Adam Mair was a straight A student. Maybe he can read it to them.
    Oh and Goose and Sabretooth were reading last year! I love when good looking tall Sabres read little kid books!

  6. 6 CrotchetyOriginalSam November 16, 2008 at 2:37 am

    Tough love is the best kind. Also, Jacques Lemaire would like to borrow this book when you’re done with it. No hurry…

  7. 7 Heather B. November 16, 2008 at 2:51 am

    The guy on the cover looks like Roy-Z after Lindy tries to exlain The System to him.

  8. 8 Gambler November 16, 2008 at 1:03 pm

    Kate, I love you for making that Dog Whisperer reference! The Sabres just need a calm assertive pack leader.

  9. 9 Amy November 16, 2008 at 5:58 pm

    I think you seriously have to consider shock collars.

    I think Lindy and the coaching staff might get a little too much joy from shocking the players whenever there’s breakdowns in the system.

    However, if the “Dog Whisperer” doesn’t work, does Darcy then call Nanny Jo from “Supernanny” to bring order to the chaos?


  1. 1 System Free Saturday Trackback on March 7, 2009 at 4:33 am

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