Let’s just be honest about the situation. The Senators are in our heads, BIG TIME.
The first step is admitting you have a problem: My name is Katebits, and I’m scared shitless of the Senators. I’m powerless against them.
The SECOND step is to gather your strength, put on your big boy pants (as Buffalo Pundit would say if he cared even remotely about hockey), AND MAN THE EFF UP.
Every man, woman, and Sabretooth in Buffalo has to do their part tonight to propel the Sabres to victory.
I make a lot of jokes about superstitions, but ordinarily, I’m more of a, screw-superstition-the-players-make-their-own-luck kind of fan. If the Sabres lose, it’s because they played poorly, or worse, it’s because they just suck in first place.
But the Senators are different because they are in my head, and I don’t like having disgusting Sens in my head. I mean…ew. The Sens are different because even though I claim I’m not superstitious, I already have that sinking feeling in my stomach like the results are already written- that our destiny is already set.
Tonight, this ends. Tonight, we must all do our part. Tonight, we must all face our personal fear of the Senators, and we must cast that fear aside. I don’t know why the Sabres have had such trouble with the Senators, but they clearly need our help getting over the hump. So, tonight we will help. Everyone in Buffalo must get on board to help defeat the Sens.
The Sabres must win this game.
If you have a lucky jersey, wear it. If you have a pregame ritual, do it. If you’re going to the game, leave your grumpiness at home. Everyone must focus their psychic powers and positive energy on tonight’s game. We have to root like we’ve never rooted before. We have to go for it. We have to practice not being afraid of the Sens, and we have to do it now because this “We always lose to the Sens” shit WILL NOT DO in the playoffs.
There is no more time to waste. Tonight is the night.
Let’s Go Buff-a-lo!