Archive for October, 2010



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Are You Freaking Out? Me Either!

I think it’s a little funny how we’re falling all over each other on Twitter to declare that we’re, “not pressing the panic button yet”.  I honestly don’t think there is a single person in town who actually is panicking.

Panicking requires some element of, “OH MY GOD IN HEAVEN!  WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!  THIS IS TOTALLY UNEXPECTED AND ENTIRELY UNFORESEEABLE!  NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS DID I THINK THAT THIS SITUATION COULD BE A POSSIBILITY,” and, well, let’s face it, that dynamic is not in play here.

The Sabres are just being the Sabres right now.  (I know, Crunchy.  The truth hurts.)

Please join me in a deep sigh of mild irritation to commemorate the annoying start to the 2010/11 season: *Inhale….aaannnd release*

Those of us who have been vigilantly watching this team for the last few years are definitely not panicking.  We’re mostly just rolling our eyes and thinking, “Oh for pete’s sake, VANEK.

(I will admit [in a totally nonchalant, non-panicking kind of way] that it would be nice if Myers stopped sucking.  That one does have my blood pressure up just a teensy-tiny bit.  Not panicking.  Just wary.)

That Game Was NOT Good

Now look.  I’ve been to a few bad games in my day.

I’ve seen them lose big, I’ve seen them lose pathetically, and I’ve seen them skate onto the ice, point directly at my chair and say, “Hold on to your hat, because we’re going to break your heart tonight, Katebits”.  But I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a game that was quite that bad in terms of entertainment value.   That game was a. boring, b. stupid, c. lame.

Good thing for big beers.

But the good news is, all of the miners are out of the earth (can you BELIEVE they got all of those guys out?!  That is miraculous.), AND I got to sit in a suite for the third period.   So, all in all, things could be worse.

3 Things

1.Well, that was a real clusterfuck.

2. The first thought I had when I woke up this morning was, “I’m so glad Pommerdoodle is not dead or paralyzed.” I was really truly rattled by the “medical emergency” aspect of the game last night. It’s twenty hours later, and I still feel a little off about it. I’m sure Jason Pominville is also feeling a bit off today. Poor guy.

I’ve never seen the stretcher at a game before, and it’s really terrifying.  To be honest, I was a little surprised by how scared I got during the incident.  Major injury is a part of hockey that is easy to ignore until you see one of your favorite guys motionless on the ice, and then it’s very sobering.

I think an incident like this might be a little scarier in the arena than on television. In the arena you’re just sitting there without replays, without Rick Jeanneret, and without commercials for distraction.  Thank goodness for twitter and for texting, because from our seats, we couldn’t see Pommers when he was down on the ice, and we had no idea if he had moved or even regained consciousness.  I’m not sure I could have enjoyed the rest of the game at ALL if Jessica hadn’t texted me and told me that Jason was awake and that he had moved his arms.

Get well soon, P-Doods.

3. I had every intention of writing specifically about the hit, and telling you what I think should happen to Hjalmarsson, and blah blah blah blah, but eff it.

I hated seeing Pominville injured like that- I hated it-  but, I like it when the Sabres hit the other team hard.  The harder, the better.  This is not an easy topic, and there are no easy answers.  Frankly, this whole issue makes me a little uncomfortable about being a hockey fan

So, rather than write about this, I’m going to shut my laptop, I’m going to go put on my ipod, I’m going to go paint my upstairs hallway, and I’m going to be grateful that I’m a violist and not an NHL rule maker.

The Saddest Song in the World

Sometimes the Sabres are SO bad, even singing “My Favorite Things” can’t help them.

  :(  Is there ANYTHING sadder than a sad version of My Favorite Things?

Mercifully, I had to work tonight, and while I intended to watch the game on a DVR delay a coworker accidentally told me the score.   Thank goodness.

Let’s all get a good night’s sleep, and we’ll talk about it in the morning.

Heather and Katebits Figure It All Out

Last night Heather B. and I had a long convoluted conversation on twitter.  If you follow both of us, and you happened to be lurking quietly on twitter at about 12:30am, you probably saw the entire conversation unfold.  If that’s case, I apologize for subjecting you to this nonsense for a second time.  But the rest of you HOLD ONTO YOUR HATS, because Heather and I are GENIUSES.

Alright. I guess it all started when Mike Harrington sent me a link to his Sabres Edge post which contains this video:

Hearing Thomas Vanek speaking German was a revelation for me.  How have I never fully realized that Vanek is AUSTRIAN?!   He’s AUSTRIAN, you guys!  That explains EVERYTHING.   Of course I knew before last night that Vanek is Austrian, but something about seeing him sternly lecturing those little school children in a language I don’t understand really drove the point home.  You can take the boy out of Austria, but you can’t take the Austria out of the boy.  Vanek came to North America when he was 14, and he eventually became a Golden Gopher.  I think I’ve been thinking about him as a Minnesotan all this time.

Anyhooch.

When you’re suddenly all, “Ooooh, riiiight.  He’s AUSTRIAN,” about a dude, naturally, the first thing you’re going to do is ask yourself, “Is Vanek, in fact, exactly like Captain Von Trapp?”

Let’s go to the video….

Check.

Vanek IS exactly like Captain Von Trapp!

I’ll admit, Vanek is not as nearly as handsome as Captain Von Trapp, and as much as I wish it were otherwise, his singing voice is atrocious, but you’ve GOT to admit that there are plenty of other similarities.   He’s a reluctant leader, he’s grouchy for no apparent reason, he HATES singing, he’s completely humorless, and while I don’t know this to be true, it seems VERY likely that Vanek calls his children with a dog whistle.

Heather suggested that maybe Vanek is so grouchy because Pommers and Roy-Z don’t respond to the whistle properly, which led to us comparing all the Sabres to characters in “The Sound of Music”.  (Heather hilariously suggested that Roy-Z is Liesl.  [He thinks he knows everything now that he’s sixteen.])   We quickly deduced that perhaps the biggest problem with the Sabres is that they have no obvious Maria.  How can a hockey team find love, win the Stanley Cup, become a musical sensation, and escape from the Nazis if they have no Maria?!

Mike Grier seems to us to be the closest thing we’ve got to a Maria…..which is hilarious when you think about it.  Ryan Miller also briefly played the role of Maria when we started imagining Goose, Tyler Myers and Butts wearing wimples and singing, “How do you Solve a Problem Like Crunchy?”

So, there we were, casting all the Sabres in “The Sound Of Music,” when Heather had the funniest idea in the history of EVER.  The Sabres goal song should be “Climb Every Mountain.”   I KNOW.  SHE’S A GENIUS.

I urge you to press play on this video so you can remember for yourself HOW MUCH THIS SONG KICKS ASS.   The goal celebration music should start at the 1:44 mark.

I’m sure you will agree that “Climb Every Mountain” is THE BEST GOAL SONG EVER. It’s rousing, it’s inspirational, it’s soaring, and it’s sung by a WARBLING NUN!   WHAT COULD BE BETTER?!

In addition to being hilarious and TOTALLY AWESOME, “Climb Every Mountain” would be EXCELLENT for annoying Roy-Z and Timmeh.   I feel like 9 and 19 really think they’re too cool for school, and the best thing for them would be to have to celebrate goals to the sound of a nun belting out an inspirational melody about perseverance.

 

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The Sabres are back tonight!  If all goes well, maybe this is the year the Sabres actually WILL climb every mountain.  Happy Hockey, Dear Readers!

Let’s Go Buff-a-lo!

 

 

3 Fairly Dumb Things

I need to put up a new post just to get the Chelsea Dagger rant off the top of my blog.  I think throwing a complete conniption fit about a goal song is perfectly appropriate for one day.  Two days is pushing it.  Three days is taking things too far.

So, here are some (fairly dumb) things for you:

1. On Saturday I thought my favorite pink scarf had been stolen from the coat rack at Left Bank.  I was pretty bummed about it mostly because I really liked that scarf, but also because I’ve always thought of Left Bank as one of those home-away-from-home places where nothing bad could ever happen to me or to any of my scarves.  But, these things happen, so I quietly mourned and tried to move forward in a post-pink-scarf world.

BUT THEN.

Last night I went to Left Bank and my scarf was hanging on the coat rack!  Three days later!  I KNOW!

The prevailing theory among my friends is that the scarf had probably been accidentally knocked off the coat rack, and then put back on the wrong hook.  My friend Richard speculated that maybe someone took my scarf by mistake and then returned it later- which would be a very awesome (and very Buffalo-y) thing to do.  These theories make sense, but I like to think that my scarf was “borrowed” by someone very fabulous, taken on grand adventures across the land, and then returned to the place where the temporary-scarf-thief knew I would definitely return- Left Bank.  I think my scarf looks a little more worldly, a LOT wiser, and maybe a wee bit more hung over then it did before I lost it on Saturday.  I hope it had fun out there.

2. You know what I think is interesting about attending hockey games?  You can’t hear a single word the people in front of you say, but you can hear EVERY word the people behind you say.   This was driven home at the preseason Flyers game a few days ago when Heather and I were taking turns talking like Ryan Miller after he had to defend against that 3-on-0 last year (“::angry glare::”  “I’ve never even SEEN a 3-on-0 before.”  “Not even in PEE WEE hockey.”  “I don’t even understand how something like that can happen.”  “I hate my teammates.”), and the guy sitting in front of us turned around and told us that 3-on-0s happen all the time in his beer league.   It’s funny how the acoustics of the arena mean you’re constantly eavesdropping and being eavesdropped on, but you’re not exactly in a good position to have a conversation with the people around you.

3. I am really truly psyched that real, meaningful hockey is almost here.


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