Down the Line

I promised myself that I wouldn’t start analyzing the Sabres until they’d played ten games, but I can’t hold myself back because I LOVE THEM SO MUCH. I just want to line the Sabres up, and walk down the line, ruffle their hair one-by-one, and tell them each why I love them so. You know what?  That’s exactly what I’m going to do.

I doubt the actual Sabres are willing to stand in a line for me, so you’ll just have imagine the hair tussling.

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The Sabres, presented in the order in which I think of them, which is probably a pretty good indication of the order of their awesomeness:

Thomas Vanek– Thomas Vanek, I’ve written many, many, many times about how incredible it is to watch you when you’re “on”. You’re just spectacular. But this season feels a little different. You seem so joyful out there. Joy is the one thing that has always been missing from your game. I’ll admit, your visible frustration on the ice has always made me a tad hesitant to really believe in you as “The Guy.” I’ve been joking for YEARS that you need therapy, and I’m starting to believe that maybe this summer you finally got some. (And just FYI, if I were running a professional sports team, sports psychology would be a requirement for every single player on my payroll, so, my insistence that you get therapy is really nothing personal. I only bring up the therapy with you because of all the Sabres, historically you’ve seemed to be the most crazypants. I guess that part is a little personal.) At any rate, as I wrote last night on Twitter, when you’re cool, everything’s cool. So, keep up the good work, and do whatever your therapist says. That guy/lady is a genius.

Jason Pominville– Jason, you’re a Sabre who I’ve always loved unconditionally, so it’s super fun to see you being all captain-ly and top-line-y. I don’t know how you do it, but you are the only hockey player I’ve ever seen who somehow manages to look adorable no matter what you’re doing. That’s a compliment (of course).

Ville Leino- Last night was extremely good for our relationship, Ville. After your pretty pass to Pommers for the goal, I wasn’t just happy for me, I realized I was genuinely happy for you. That doesn’t happen with every goal (for example, I don’t think Derek Roy has ever scored a goal that made think, “Oh, I’m so happy for Roy-Z!” His goals are just the garden-variety, “Hooray! The Sabres just scored and this makes me, Katebits, feel joy in my heart). Ville, I want you to be an awesome Sabre, and I feel extreme confidence that you WILL be an awesome Sabre, so just hang tight, buddy. You’ve got this. (Also, you and McCormick were strangely good together last night. That was weird, thrilling, and totally unexpected.)

Ryan Miller– *fist bump and chin nod of eternal respect*

Drew Stafford– How you doin’?

Tyler Myers– *gets on a step-stool in order to ruffle Tyler’s hair* Hey there big guy! You seem to be either totally awesome or totally terrifying. Last night you were totally awesome and it was really good to see. Just try to be awesome most nights. But don’t worry. The team is better this year. Not everything will go straight to hell if you have a few bad games in a row.

Christian Ehrhoff– I love how you shoot, and I also like how your lips always look like you’re wearing a tinted lip gloss.

Luke Adam– Lu-kie! Lu-kie! Lu-kie! Welcome to Buffalo, kiddo! You’re doing great. Just keep working hard, and when in doubt in the gym or out on the town, do what Goose does. Speaking of Goose…

Paul Gaustad– HONK! Goose, I’d like to encourage you to casually undress in the background of all your teammates’ interviews.

Andrej Sekera– You’re probably my favorite skater on the team. Good job.

Brad Boyes– Um, this is a little awkward. Usually Darcy’s trade deadline acquisitions are gone by now, but… you seem to still be here. Hm…. Oooh, I know! You have a very pleasant-looking face. Don’t let anyone ever tell you otherwise, Brad Boyes.

Derek Roy– I’m not exactly sure what’s wrong with you but you haven’t looked like yourself yet this season. Maybe you miss Vanek? I’m not too worried because apparently the Sabres don’t really need you to be awesome in order to win games. I have faith that you’ll pull it together soon. And if you don’t, well… *shrug* We apparently don’t really need you to win games! (That might sound a little harsh. Roy-Z, I think what I’m trying to tell you is: don’t get frustrated. When you suddenly get awesome again, it’s just going to make the Sabres LITERALLY UNSTOPPABLE, but for the time being, your atypical-averageness isn’t really doing any harm.

Cody McCormick– You were surprisingly good with Leino last night! Nice job. Everyone in Buffalo likes to root for you already, but if you can be the catalyst for getting Leino on track, I think we might erect a statue in your honor.

Tyler Ennis– Look, Tyler. I can’t lie. I’m a little worried about you. I’m not like, freaked about you, but I’m concerned. You need to tone down the “dipsy-doodling followed by a blueline turnover.” Just tone it down. Also, could you please clarify something? Is this actually you? That looks a LOT like Ehrhoff’s head on your body to me, but after an in-depth twitter investigation, the consensus seems to be that is IS you. I’m still not convinced. Your thoughts?

Jhonas Enroth– YOU ARE AN ELVISH HERO! Most of the time I forget all about you, but every time I remember you I get an incredible burst of confidence. Seriously. You might change everything this season. That’s how important and awesome you are. You might change everything.

Nathan Gerbe- Rock on, lil Honey Badger. Rock on.

Patrick Kaleta– Hey, Patty. You haven’t provoked my ire at all this season. Good job. Every once in a while, I think you’re Vanek on the ice. That amuses me.

Robyn Regehr– I can’t say I have any strong thoughts or feelings about you, but actually, that’s probably a good thing. You seem cool. Thanks for helping Mylers be less spazzy. I’m not going to ruffle your hair because, a.) you’re pretty much bald, and b.) you seem too dignified for such things. I’ll just shake your hand respectfully, instead.

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Ah, that felt great! It’s fun to love the Sabres! I’m a little concerned about the future of this blog (nothing kills The Willful Caboose faster than a complete lack of over-the-top outrage), but we’ll make do.  I’m sure I’ll find something to complain about eventually, but for now, I love these little buggers.

10 Things

1. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! WOOOOOOOOOO!! WOOOOOOOOOOOO! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

2. Hot DAMN, that was a fun weekend of Sabre-y goodness. After our Friday morning concert, I zipped home, dropped off my viola, threw on my new BITCHIN’ Sabres tee, and hauled ass over to Lanette’s where I got to experience her SABRES THEMED ROOM for the first time. (She’s got a goal horn and a red light, you guys.) Then today, I wandered over to the arena, and watched the game with lots of peeps while eating bratwurst and freezing my ass off. (It’s much, MUCH colder in the arena this season. For reals.)

3. Look, I know it’s only two games, but the Sabres are obviously going 82-0 this season. It’s preeeetty much a done deal. The thing I enjoyed the most about the games was that they were just so breezy. The Sabres won with ease. They didn’t even appear to break a sweat. I’m just kidding about the Sabres going 82-0, but it sure is nice to get a good start.

4. Today Patty and I were a little confused about the lines, and we were just naming guys, trying to figure out who’s playing with who, and at one point we just sort of paused and I was all, “…It feels like the Sabres have lots of good forwards all of a sudden.” It was an odd and thrilling realization. In almost any combination, the Sabres have three really good scoring lines, and a rollicking fourth line. (Although, [and this is barely a complaint], I’m sad that Lindy seems to have broken up Kaleta, Goose, and Gerbe. I looooved that line, and they were such a fun combination of punch-y and score-y. Bring them back, Lindy!)

5. We knew Leino would be an improvement on Connolly (at the very least), but if Luke Adam continues being so compatible with Vanek, we are REALLY in business. One of the perks of refusing to learn about our prospects is that every time a new kid shows up in a Sabres uniform and he isn’t a pile of puke, I’m pleasantly surprised. I remember being fairly impressed with Adam during his stint with the Sabres last season, but obviously he wasn’t getting time on a line with Vanek back then. This is a whole new situation. Kudos to Lindy for putting that combination together, and mega-kudos to Adam for stepping up to the plate. It’s fun to root for the young guys. (Private to Luke Adam: I just made a “category” on this blog for you. That means you should go ahead and find a permanent place to live in Buffalo. The only guy I’ve ever incorrectly put on the”Sabre” list was Mark Mancari, and really, that was just a rookie mistake on my part. Find yourself an apartment, kiddo. Call me if you ever need viola or ridiculous-blogging lessons.)

6. The defense is remarkably better. Here’s how we can tell:

• Miller’s job has looked easy (rather than terrifying).
• Myers hasn’t freaked us out at ALL so far. Remember how scary he was at the beginning of last season? It’s hard to say how much of  Myers’ non-suckiness can be attributed to him being older and wiser, and how much of it can be attributed to the fact that he now gets to play with Robyn Regehr instead of a rotating collection of spazzes, but either way, HOORAY.
• Ehrhoff, Ehrhoff, Ehrhoff, Ehrhoff, Ehrhoff, Ehrhoff. I love me some Christian Ehrhoff
• Mike Weber. Perfectly serviceable Mike Weber, is sitting in the press box because we don’t need him. When someone inevitable gets hurt, it won’t be a total crisis (unless it’s Myers), because we’ll still have Mike Weber. It sucks for Mike Weber that the Sabres don’t need him, but it ROCKS for us.

7. It really struck me today how appropriate it is that this team started the season in Europe.

Europe is where North Americans go when we want to “find ourselves”. I’ve been to Europe twice, both times for viola-related reasons, and both times I came home all starry-eyed and inspired to TAKE ON THE WORLD. Europe is where we go to be young, and romantic, and to ride trains, and think Big Important Thoughts. I can’t imagine a better place for our young team to start this season. As much as I’m looking forward to the home opener I almost wish we could leave the Sabres over there for a little while longer. Obviously they like Europe. I love the idea of them having adventures, and writing flowery prose in their journals, and tasting weird fish-y foods that Ville Leino swears are a Finnish delicacy.

8. I feel obligated to comment on Lindy’s choice for the captaincy, so here goes: I approve. Good job, Lindy.

9. Heather’s talking sense here.

10. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!