1. You know what commercial I’ve seen WAY more than enough of? The one for a men’s deodorant where the voiceover asks, “What’s your armpit type? Sweaty? Hairy? Sensitive?” That commercial is gross. I understand that men have armpits, and that those armpits need deodorant, but frankly, I don’t like thinking about armpit types.
2. Speaking of armpits and other slightly gross things, I have to make a confession:
I have a crush on Evgeni Malkin.
I wish I could just say “I’m in awe of his playing,” but sadly, it’s more than just that. It’s all very unseemly and disturbing, but I can’t keep it bottled up inside any longer…I’m…hot for Evgeni Malkin.
I’m admitting this tonight because tonight he scored a hat trick, and “I’m hot for Evgeni Malkin” makes a LOT more sense when you’ve just seen him score a goal like this, but I’ve been nursing this crush for awhile now.
Let’s never speak of this again.